Thursday, March 8, 2012

What Belongs to Me

Good evening all, I know I've been absent for a couple weeks but was doing a lot of work and a lot of thinking.  I'm glad I have friends who make me think because it gives me interesting things to talk about with you guys.

First off, I'm a pack rat and while I was unpacking a few boxes from when I moved, I found a feature story that I wrote for my high school's newspaper about having secret lovers during Valentine's Day. Then I've been listening to the new Monica and Brandy song It All Belongs to me. I have to say that I love the song but don't understand the situation.  Not that I don't understand break ups cause I've had my share... TRUST ME!  Some where good some horrible but I never took anything back from the guy after the realtionship ended.  That's what I took the song to mean was leave that sh#t that I bought for you, but my girl took it to mean that she was paying fir everything and now that she's done with him, he needs to leave that sh#t cause it all belongs to me. 

I guess your interpretation depends on how you were raised.  I was raised with clear gender roles. Don't get me wrong, I think girls can do anything a boy can do just as well or better, but I WOULD NEVER take care of a man where I would have to tell him it all belongs to me.  I have always believed in equal contributions to a relationship.  But the video got me to looking around me.  I know people who, in my opinion, have bought their boyfriend or girlfriend's affections.  I watched one person give their significant other jewelry and shoes for what they called a 'gift' but it was my friend's birthday.  Then while I was at school I ease-dropped on a chick talking about how she had to pay for her boyfriend's cell phone bill and she still hadn't paid her rent.  My question is:  What the HELL is wrong with your self worth that you don't know that as long as your man is not dead or disabled he is to take care of himself? 

My husband and I are involved in every aspect of our day to day activities.  He may not cook or clean everyday, but I don't have to go to work everyday.  If the kids are sick or have a parent teacher conference, we both know about it and what is going on.  If I bought my husband a gift, I wouldn't take it back if we broke up.  But I would not shower him with gifts to stay around.  I know that some people say 'well, women get gifts from men in a relationship' but I can't see getting if I'm not giving.  Cause as far as I'm concerned, I want your heart more than your material things... after all "It all belongs to me".

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